It's Painful When People Disappear

"I too have been feeling my share of . . . utter helplessness"

With the recent rash of arrests and deportations in the U.S. comes the feeling of utter helplessness and disorientation. The pure horror one feels when a person just disappears is found in the following letters.

I recall first assembling the pieces of this picture and feeling crushed at these final lines:

It will never be easy to accept what had happened in S.E. Asia and to all the worthy people there who wanted to live in freedom.

What has it all been about? I only pray Anna and the others will be heard from soon. If not, I don’t know what more there is to say.

I’ve read this excerpt many times and I still feel a sense of loss and bewilderment.

Book Excerpt: “Losing Anna”

The following series of letters were included in my parents’ papers. They tell a story which does not need much embellishment. They depict a sliver of the often unseen (by American) effects of the Vietnam War.

A reminder: my family left Saigon on April 3rd. This correspondence was received and sent by my mother in Idaho where we were awaiting my father’s return.

April 2, 1975

Dear Mrs. Welch –

I have today forwarded a package via parcel post addressed to you, but which is actually intended for Miss Anna Tran Thi Doa ... a clerk in a dress shop in Saigon and we understand that both of you are somewhat acquainted.

I must apologize to you for taking this liberty and then asking that you deliver the parcel to Miss Anna, but in the interest of saving time during unknown conditions recently I thought this might be the best way...

Mrs. Welch, we people back here cannot know fully what you may be going through in Saigon today but please know that our prayers and hopes are constantly for your safety and also for the safety especially for those in Vietnam whom we also know.

Our family has for some years corresponded with Anna and her friends and we cannot bear to think of her and her family being burdened with more problems and trouble. We love her very much.

Thank you, Mrs. Welch, for assisting us in getting this parcel to Anna.

Sincerely,

Mr. and Mrs. Ralph S. and son, Grant S.

* * *

April 3, 1975

Dear Mr & Mrs. Welch,

You must surely be tiring of me by this time, but must do whatever I can for Anna. What we (my parents and I) are now doing is trying to arrange for Anna’s sister, Luu, to come over here immediately on a visitor’s visa. Immigration says it’s fairly easy to do, and later when the Saigon Gov’t falls, she will simply be declared a refugee. At least will have her here at that time. We’ll also try to find others to do the same for the other three as soon as possible, but no guarantees.

In a few days you should receive a letter from my parents which will contain a typed letter for Luu inviting her to visit them in California for as long as possible. There may also be a financial affidavit and an airline ticket, but we may have Pan Am reserve the ticket for her to pick up at the Pan Am window at the airport instead of mailing it. It will be paid in cash here. With the letter, etc. she should have no trouble in obtaining the visa and getting out of there very soon. Again, thanks for everything.

Sincerely,

Grant S.

* * *

April 5, 1975

Mrs. Welch,

This note to you is written very hurriedly as time today seems to be of the essence, and I know you will understand.

In our hasty attempt to get Luu (Tran The Luu), sister of Anna, over here on even so much as a Visitor visa we encounter so much detail and red-tape over the the usual procedures that we are attempting every short-cut we can muster, even to Mr. Ford, to approve some instant way to do this.

Enclosed is a copy of the letter which is on its way to Luu but that is in the usual procedure. Mrs. S and myself spent yesterday with Immigration in San Diego to little avail as they are under so much pressure. We are now working to have Congressman Clair W. Burgener (San Diego) in Washington, DC do what he can.

Our son, Grant, is again writing to you today. I am preparing Support Affidavits to use if required in this “instant” solution.

Hastily, with apologies to you and thanks to you.

Ralph S.

* * *

April 14, 1975

Dear Mrs. Welch,

I was very happy to write this short letter to you. I hear you and your children return home alright. I call your home in Saigon and we know you be fine. Please tell me how you are now. Today I didn’t hear anything about my parents in Danang. I only pray for they safety.

And I will tell you the news from my sister who will go to U.S. soon if she get visa early. Mr. Ralph who is Grant father, he do very big help us but I know you are leaving Saigon. I will try very hard for this and will send my sister over there.

I knew you very kindness with me since you been in Saigon. And I am and my Luu sister never forget you kind. I start to do the visitor visa for Luu today but I don’t know when she ready for you. I know many trouble in my country.

Please say hello to your children for me. Best wishes to you and your family. Thank you for everything again.

Sincerely,

Anna

April 23, 1975

Dear Welch,

I was very happy to write for you today. How are you and your children now? Did they go to school yet? How is the weather over there. I still work with Alice. I’ve many American friends go home. Maybe have a chance soon in Saigon.

I did not hear anything from my family. Last week my sister have airline ticket from Grant’s parents, I hope my sister can leave Vietnam soon. I try to get out here too but I know very hard. Yesterday, I came to your house in Saigon for see your husband but he not there. Did he return home or still in Saigon? If he still here you please help me ask him for me, did my box from Grant parents come yet? and please let me know by my phone . . . or my address . . .

Dear Welch, please give me your favor. And now your husband very busy in his work but I don’t know how get the things for supply. Please understand for me. We never forget your kindness with us since you been Saigon.

I hope someday I can get out this country. I will come to visit your family in U.S.A. We have more trouble around Saigon too. Everyone in the world very worried for Vietnam in future. I pray for the Peace come soon. Will write for you more if I have some news from my sister who try go to American. Please write for me soon if you can. Thank you again.

Sincerely,

Anna

* * *

May 4, 1975

Dear Mr & Mrs. Welch,

Please excuse my not answering your letter until now, but as you might well expect I’ve been otherwise occupied in recent weeks. As a result I’m pretty far behind these days and must try to catch up as quickly as possible.

To begin with here, I want to thank you both for all you’ve done for Anna and us. And especially to you, Mrs. Welch, for being so considerate as to call my parents as you did, and then to contact me by letter. I understand very well the sadness with which you wrote at that time, since I too have been feeling my share of that along with utter helplessness. By now I trust Mr. Welch has returned safely. [My mother had just heard he was safe on May 2, 1975.]

The last word I had from Anna was dated Apr. 23. She was absolutely desperate and had found no way at that time to get any of them out of Saigon. Of course the red tape and bribe-taking were still in effect then, which means that in the week following anything might have happened. Time was too short for me to do anything more from this end, so whatever happened in that last week was the result of Anna’s own efforts probably and perhaps being at the right place at the right time.

Personally I put more faith in prayer than luck, so still hold high hopes that somehow they did succeed in getting out.

Now that Mr. Welch is undoubtedly back home, or on the way, I’d like to ask him a few questions. Did Anna receive my letter of April 15 with copies of letters I had written to the President and to Ambassador Martin? Did you and she receive my letter of April 21? Do you know what their status was at the time you left Saigon? I know how extremely occupied you must have been during that period, but perhaps you were able to help Anna and the others in some way. I pray so.

I will always be grateful for the help and friendship you gave Anna and know you did everything possible. It will never be easy to accept what had happened in S.E. Asia and to all the worthy people there who wanted to live in freedom.

What has it all been about? I only pray Anna and the others will be heard from soon. If not, I don’t know what more there is to say.

Thanks for all you did.

Sincerely,

Grant S.

About Kat Fitzpatrick, curator of “Stories of Vietnam:”

I am a speaker and a writer (see list of upcoming events below). One of the few American dependents living in Saigon at the end of the Vietnam War (1975), I was the daughter of a CIA operative who worked in ultra-secret propaganda. I have a Journalism, B.A. and a Creative Writing, M.F.A., and is the author of the 2023 narrative nonfiction book, For the Love of Vietnam: a war, a family, a CIA official, and the best evacuation story never heard.

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Upcoming Public Events:

• 4/30 — “Vietnam Stories” ~ Community Sharing led by Karen Kaiser and Kat Fitzpatrick, Adams Station Clubhouse, Delmar, NY, 6:30pm

• 05/1 — “Vietnam Stories” ~ Community Sharing led by Karen Kaiser and Kat Fitzpatrick, Round Lake Library, Malta Branch, NY, 6:30pm

• 05/15- Letters Home exhibit, NY State Museum (A family letter from the evacuation will be on display.)

• 6/4 - Slideshow Presentation with Karen Kaiser, Crandall Library, Glens Falls, NY, 1-2:30pm

• 6/28 – Arlington Commons Book Fair, Vermont, 10am-4pm | Presentation at 1:30pm